There's a BIG rat in mi kitchen what am I gonna go?

Today, I went to a new "SHISHA" establishment in Manchester, trying to sort out some problematic printers, they have 2 PC's and 3 Printers - and the wireless kitchen printers are giving us some problems.

I walk in trying to do just that, changing wireless printers to cabled ones, and there it was, waiting for me in the kitchen - the biggest RAT that I've ever seen - in fact, I think it was across between a rat and a Woolly Mammoth, and gnawing on everything - and it's certainly BIGGER than my size 11 feet. 

My companion, the owner, told me that it's a small mouse, I said, in Bolton, we usually call anything heavier than 5kg, a BIG-ONE.