15th / 16th January 2013 - Unlucky for some...

Tonight, around 11:00PM, I was travelling from Darwen (Lancashire) to Bury (GT. Manchester), down the "Old Roman Road", a twisting & narrow, snake like path, more suited for Roman infantry than modern day vehicles. I have been down this road many times before, and I knew how hazardous it was, so I was very careful, took my time and slowed down, in order to avoid crashing, hitting something or driving, face first, into a ravine.

At the end of the road, I was very relieved to be alive, and that's when my sat-nav instructed me to turn left and drive for 1.8Miles, followed by a right turn and a further 4.6Miles, so I did...


When driving, I always follow the contours of the road, as displayed on the sat-nav's screen, and this time - the sat-nav showed a straight road with no bends, and the road signage agreed, by telling me that national speed limit applies - 50mph... So I did the usual thing and pushed pedal to the metal. I knew that I was going a bit too fast, especially with the icy and slippery road conditions, all of a sudden, there was slight bend in the road, a bend that wasn't on the sat-nav screen,  a GIVE WAY junction, and a car approaching from the left. OH SHIIIIIIIIT!, Damn you sat-nav with your inaccurate information & for giving men this false sense of empowerment.....

I tried the foot brakes and hand brakes, but the prevailing icy road conditions and the ATS intervention, meant that all those were useless and I was not going to stop in time.  So, and in a desperate bid to avoid hitting this car, I carried out an erratic and dangerous swerve onto the kerb, going over that, barely missing the other vehicle and the road sign that's telling me to watch out for oncoming traffic - To avoid hitting the other car was my main concern however, hitting the kerb at 70+mph is never a pretty sight. So the car flew up in the air, after the violent initial loud bangs, and landed on the other side of the traffic island, facing oncoming traffic, with 4 flat tyres...  What a bastard...


So I sat in the car for what seemed like an age or eternity (probably 2 minutes), thanking my lucky stars for the close escape, before getting out in the freezing temperature -4 degrees, in order to assess the damage, and my situation.  And damage there was.... 

4 flat tyre, 2 popped, with one of the tyres having a 4" gaping holes, and one fully detached from the rim - So 2 tyres were beyond being pumping any-time soon.

Now, how many spare tyres do you have in your car? - I had the same number "1". But I did have an electric pump - but no idea on where to start. So I decided to try and replace the tyre that was detached from the rim for a start, and so I proceeded.

I had one little problem my tyre rims had security nuts attached, so that nobody can steal those - and I did not have the keys for those, I think the previous car owner forgot to give me those - so I knew that I was gonna struggle with those nuts. But for some reason, the impact managed to knock-out the security nut-head from its location, so half a standard nut was exposed instead (things are looking up).

So I struggled to take the spare tyre out, especially with all the junk that I had in the boot of the car. And finally, and after taking everything else out, I managed to get to the spare tyre.

That night was freezing, and most of the roads were covered in snow - So I thought the best thing was to try and inflate the 2 rear flat tyres and then take it from there, so I did - and luckily, they did keep the air.

I inflated both rear tyres,

I jacked-up  the car and removed the front "driver-side" tyre, the one that came loose off the rim.
I replaced the front "driver-side" tyre, with the spare tyre,

I removed the rear "driver-side" tyre, and swapped that with the front "passenger-side, even though the latter had a 4" gaping hole, but as they say, desperate times call for desperate measures "(removing both and replacing both, one tyre at a time, and resting the car on the spare tyre & rim - (the tyre that I took off earlier from the front driver-side).


2 Hours later, hands are freezing and numb, butt is freezing and numb, I'm unable to feel my toes or anything else for that matter, but I do have 3 serviceable tyres and a forth with a BIG hole, and I'm, in the middle of nowhere, and 12miles away from home. 



The best thing is this, that in-spite of my struggle, in the middle of nowhere, planted in the oncoming traffic lane (and there was a fair bit of incoming traffic, barely missing me), and even though I looked like I was in trouble, and I was struggling.  Nobody stopped, asked if I was OK or whether I needed help...  


So now, I drive, fairly slowly, around 8-10 miles / hour and hope for the best, with 3 tyres and 1 super deflated tyre. 

The Noise,
The Vibrations,

The Banging,
The Smell of Burning Rubber,
The ABS Lights,
The Brake Lights,
Drivers Pointing at the Tyre,


8 Miles later, at around 3:30am, I managed to get to Bolton, & because my usual Garage is nearer than my house, I decided to leave the car outside that - I written them a note telling them to replace & fix all and posted that, with my keys, through the letterbox.

I had a look at the tyre I used for the rear "drivers-side", and that was no longer a tyre, it was just a collection of holes, lots of holes, emitting funky fumes..